Today I was talking to Luis about what I should writing in my emails to employers. What words would capture the experienced eyes of human resources who can smell the green horn from a mile away? What sentences would properly represent the hardships that I faced for my studies and the credibility of my amazing school? What were the correct pleas that would provide a satisfying enough knock so that they will open their doors?
I think this was the break down of my job search. The mental frustration of coping with my life back at home, the blow to my pride for crawling back to Mom and Dad for funds and the gut wrenching alterations of my peers from academically striving to commercial suffocation. Welcome back into the world of the mindless masses. My cynicism is only a cry of help for salvation from my fall down the ladder. And even in that metaphor, it is not the top of the ladder that I strive for.
Me: It's too comfortable
I'd almost rather be stuck in New York, working the night shift, in my studio apartment
Luis: yeah, I know what you mean; in a weird way it makes you feel accomplished lol
Me:
it gives you the reassuring feeling that you're going to be able to make it and proud that you did it with your own hands and feet
~~~What a dream. To just live on what your own God/higher being given hands and feet. That's all I want. To be independent and be able to pursue my own happiness. I don't hate home, but this is no longer my home.
So I better go search for it.
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